Sorry All

Ok Ok OK!!!!! I have not updated lately. Funny things is...I have a lot to say I just can't say a lot of it. Edgar came home this morning from a bake sale and told me that several people asked when I was going to update the blog...a few hours later someone I work with asked me the same thing. Our main laptop has a black screen, as does our desktop...help big brother! I will be calling later! Thank goodness I have my netbook.

I will post pictures separately of Miss Pia...on picture day at school she was trying out for America's Next Top Model. If anyone needs a spokes model, I have your girl. She is still loving school and FINALLY knows the names of her friends...rather then calling them just "friend". She spent this past weekend down with a fever. Baby girl slept until almost 11am on Sunday morning. When she finally woke up, the fever was gone and she said she felt awesome. She will start soccer practice next Monday. They finally found a coach for the under 6 kids. YEAH! I can not wait to start having fun at practices and games.

SSSSHHHHH!!! Don't tell Sophia...we are taking a mini vacation soon. We are going on a 3 day cruise out of San Pedro leaving on October 2nd. We are going to show Pia what Mama and Papa used to do for a living. We plan to do nothing but chill on the ship and recharge our batteries. I think both Edgar and I are running on low as far as emotional strength. It is so much harder to walk onto that school campus everyday then we ever imagined. I see Natalia everywhere. I hear her laugh and feel her joy. Some days that brings peace...other days well...After Natalia passed we both felt it was best to get back into the groove of our lives. How else would we know if we were capable? So straight back to work and into life. Now we are just tired and need the break. Are we still doing good? Definitely...do I still cry a lot...of course...will that ever change...maybe not but I am ok with that.

Watch out words of maybe some wisdom....Death seriously sucks for those of us left behind. We think too much and agonize over the loss. We are left to think about things we could have said or done differently. In fact, at times, we torture ourselves by doing just that. We need to quickly snap ourselves out of this mindset before bitterness and sorrow take over our lives. The loss of a parent is the loss of the main anchor in our lives. Our parents have been there since our very beginnings. They are the people we look to for that final stamp of approval on our lives. When they are gone...what do we do now? Our parents reflect our past and everything we come from. The loss of a sibling or close friend brings our own mortality to light. If it could happen to them, why not me? They are our present, our stable sail in the high seas of life. The loss of a child reflects our futures. Our hopes and dreams are wrapped around our children. Every good parent wishes for a better future for our children. When they are gone our future is not as bright. Where before you looked far into the future and saw them in college/getting married/having their own kids...the present and the next moment take on more meaning.

I guess that's it for now...I have a headache and Pia wants me to come to bed...Good night and God Bless.

Much Love to you all,
Roni