The power of a song...probably the most powerful song for Edgar and I is Hannah Montana's "If We Were A Movie". Songs hold memories like treasure boxes. Natalia used to sing this at the top of her lungs. When we took her to Children's Hospital that first day, I sang her this song while we waited for her MRI to begin. We would all 4 sing this at every opportunity. Now I can't separate it from her illness. The thing is...it not only brings the hard to bear memories but the incredibly happy ones as well.
I very recently bought a portable hard drive and backuped all the family photos and videos from all our computers. Niether of us have been able to watch the videos...kind of like tearing the scab off a wound. I mean there she is talking to you and you can't put your arms around her. I had to check to make sure they had transfered ok to the hard drive and it seemed that every one I checked she was singing "If We Were A Movie". I loved hearing her voice but it also cut to the bone.
Pia started Kindergarten next month. The thought of buying her backpack brought Edgar and I to tears...no new backpack for Talia. Pia was beside herself...this time it was for real. She has bought them in the past just because if sissy was getting one so was she. My mom and I took her to the Disney Store because I was told they also had the matching lunch boxes. She put some effort and thought into looking...Princesses and Tinkerbell are too baby...she's sooo grown up. In the end Wizards of Waverly Place was choosen.
I guess that's it for now. There is just so much stuff going through my mind lately that it is hard to get all the pieces together and write them down.
Much love,
Roni
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